The Concept of an American Family...

Images, Illusions, Concepts, Unjustified Assumptions. That's the way we all are. However, my experiences of being a passive spectator to the ways of the American family has been highly enligtening to say the least. This post is again based on my limited experiences only. One need not agree with this post in entirety. Read at your own risk.

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The West is looked upon as a free society, where people are free to exercise their free-will. And in most cases, when it comes to relationships and physical intimacy, divorces, one-night stands, threesomes, "swinging", teenage sex, single mothers, old-age homes, etc. are "okie" if not all right. One often tends to generalize and it might not be completely wrong to assume that the concept of a family is not that important in the American society.

Compared to the family concept in the East, (read India, for the author is not in a position to make comments on the other countries), there are stark differences. This post is not to meant to be a denigration of either of the two societies. It is more to highlight the strong well-rooted concept of a family, that does exist in America. The author would not want to delve into the intricate comparisons between the West and the East and elaborate on the Indian system.

Some of the key concepts are enumerated below:

• Public displays of affection

It is all right for a couple, to walk hand-in-hand or kiss in public. It is considered a natural extension of their intimacy and an expression of their own selves. Neither is it taboo nor fashionable. The world merely exists and they are not bothered as to what the world thinks. To some, it might seem to be a case of arrogance or mere patronising attitude.

"Across the pale parabola of joy", it is definitely all right to live for those transient moments of joys. Summers in Minneapolis, makes one severely "outdoorsy". The author has seen couples going on walks, jogging runs, biking, canoeing, fishing, sitting on bench savoring the presence of each other in silence admiring the ways of nature, etc. etc.

However, the guilt factor of my intruding on their privacy does seep in.

• Quality time with children

An entire family, consisting of the husband-wife, daughter, son, go on a bike ride, one behind the another. There have been days when the family is on the beach of one of the so many lakes in Minneapolis, swimming; or trekking in the so many dusty natural trails around. The children love these outings and the happiness in evident in their faces.

For the working fathers and mothers, time after office is meant to be with their children and themselves. They are rigorously punctual to office, often, come early to leave early. But after they leave, rarely do they even think about the office. Weekends are meant to be with the family.

On a similar note, the author has seen familes pay a visit to the Public Library. The children are encouraged to read story books, and also borrow educational DVDs. A healthy atmosphere and the public libraries are "free" (courtesy the state tax we all pay), and usually stock an admirable collection of books (Surprisingly, Enid Blyton is missing).

• Vacations

I have known people planning on their vacations for 2-3 weeks with their family. It is a must every year. The entire family looks forward to it. Often, the places are not exotic or the busy cities of America. Privacy and natural outdoors are what appeal to them, say, hiring a wooden cabin in some national park.

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This is not to mean, that the author finds these qualities missing elsewhere. This is meant to highlight the unjustiable nature of our generalizations when it comes to people. Like mentioned before, it is not that those other elements, bordering more on the experimentation and prurient side of life, are absent.